Right now, my hotwife is out in our living room talking to a black man. This is very significant. She has been with one black man so far. It did not go well at all. I will detail it out later as it deserves its own post. Long story short, she did get off, lots, as he was a stud, built with a large cock and could fuck for an hour (or more if she would have let him). But between me coaching him in the wrong direction for the moment and him taking a road that was all his own, she said that was it, no more black men for her. I could not blame her, she almost cried after the hookup. I cannot say how crappy that made me feel and agreed with her 100%. But at the same time I knew that she did not give black men a fair shake and would now be eliminating half the population of men to choose from as she looks for studs to hook up with. He was not a good ‘sample’ for her to judge all future black men by. She spent all her life in a small town and had never been exposed to any other race actually other than whites. So that was all she had to go by, not her fault at all. Good in one sense as she was never exposed to the racism that goes on in larger cities, but bad in the other sense that her first real contact was such a downer.
The good news is, I have a friend that is very cool, very good looking, very muscular and who she thinks is absolutely gorgeous that happens to be black. While I knew him quite well, she first met him when us three went and paid pool one night. She said as soon as she saw him she thought he was hot, just read some of the other posts to see how that all started. He then came over and worked out with me one night and stayed after and talked to her and I for quite a while. We invited him bowling one night and those two flirted with each other constantly. And finally, a couple nights ago, he came over and the two of them talked for over 2 hours. This was just after she spilled the beans about being a hotwife. They since have had over 1300 texts between the two of them and a few emails of pics with no ending in sight.
Tonight, he just got off work and has to be somewhere in a couple hours so they decided they wanted to hang out for a bit. I really do not know if anything sexual is going to go on as I am still hearing voices in the living room as I type this on and off while I watch tv in the computer room. I am very worked up, but I really could care less if they do tonight or not. Because it’s a win-win. If they do, obviously, WIN. But if they don’t, think about it, he is sinking it very deep with her in her mind. See, we never allowed texting to her phone from a fuck buddy and def no 2 hour talks alone together on the phone let alone in our own living room. Nothing other than messages through email or through the message system in Adult Friend Finder. But we are treating this one different since he was a friend first.
And since this is my blog and I want to be as honest as possible with myself, then that is exactly what I am going to be. The reason I am allowing and desiring her to get to know him better is for a few rather complicated reasons. But number one is, I just do not think that she is going to leave me for a black man. I know that sounds terrible like I got a race card I have not shown yet, but let me explain. The reason we don’t want her talking to men too much is to steer clear of a possible real relationship starting. It’s not worth the risk to get close to a guy and then someone falls in love. It’s the day in and day out talks with someone that will one day possibly cause one or both people to fall in love with each other. Falling in love does not happen accidentally; I don’t care what anyone says. A major component is spending time with each other. Spending time thinking about each other. So, we just decided to minimize that from every really starting. She keeps it exceptionally on target of talking primarily about sex, sex, and more sex. What they want to do to each other and what they just did to each other and want to do again. The other component is, she should not do anything that she is not comfortable with me doing with a woman when it comes to communication. At what point does she feel uncomfortable with me spending a lot of time talking to a woman I met somewhere? It’s really just a good self check. But what if she felt there was less risk with falling in love with a guy, or less risk for me to fall in love with a woman with all that talking? Would it be allowed and feel okay? Well, I feel safer with her getting closer to a black man. As in allow her to talk to him much more. Have much more of a real relationship. This is our situation; I fully understand that this happens all the time with other people. That is not our situation.
Our facts are this – she and I both think staying in your own race is more natural for a life long relationship. Stronger family ties all the way around, especially if there are kids involved. We do not have kids nor do not plan any, just pointing to that’s the way we feel. There is just a strong barrier in our minds that would have to be broken first. Could it happen? Absolutely, I am not a dumb ass. Sure it could. But chances are lower. But, and it’s a big one, these same cultural issues that are still prevalent in today’s society that frown upon interracial relationships are the same issues that make this so hot for her and I. The phrase is – ‘You want what you can’t have”. For everyone, this is a phrase that hits home. We have seen our share of it. So, here she is, being told by society that she is not allowed to get with a black man. It should not happen; friends and family would disown her. Then the situation is being created where she wants this more than anything and it’s quite a rush. “It’s taboo and forbidden”. HA, now society just made her desire it that much more and will be that much more satisfying when it does happen.
Because of our situation, this does afford us to do is see how this goes with being more free and open. I am a firm believer in better and deeper sex will be achieved by a deeper bond emotionally. It’s a part that gets left behind in the swinging lifestyle as it is best to do so. But we are married; he is of a race that minimizes her chances of bringing out true intimate relationship where it heads to something way more serious. Instead, can it head towards a deep relationship that’s focus is based on a sexual intimacy that reaches very deep and is very strong? Can it? Or is it too risky? She and I have talked about doing a self check and not only for just her but pay attention to him. Let see how deep we can make it, how much pleasure can be achieved, but do not hurt his feeling either. Divert everything to a more intimate and deeper sexual connection. If it appears he is falling love, then we are doing it wrong and need to back up.
Since I started writing this, I have been out in the hallway at least 10 times to listen for a bit to see if they are still talking or if the talking has stopped. Meaning more pressing matters have ‘surfaced’. So far, no dice. But I am very happy that they are getting closer and closer to each other. I am no rush for something to spark, a couple of fun nights, and then poof, gone. I can see that he is willing to put a lot of energy into her, then what is the rush?
But, I just went out and dropped off a camera on the bar and pointed it at them and said ‘Don’t mind me..” and left. I had a thought that maybe they were both a little shy to get things started because I am usually in the room. But maybe they need a little help knowing that I can now watch later. Well, it worked; I just leaned out into the hallway and witnessed some of the closest and intimate kissing I have ever witnessed. They were some extremely light kisses, very long and deep. Like there is no rush, lets enjoy this, this right here. Wow. He is doing it right. He now stands above them all, he is nothing like any other guy she has been with except me. There is some serious potential here. I don’t dare go out now for a while as I think they can hear me typing and maybe they want more privacy. I would love for both of them to sink it deep with each other. This is all unbelievably interesting and so new to me. I feel nervous and extremely turned on at the same time. I fully understand what a cuckold feels. It’s a huge rush to see a man get so close to his wife.
Well, that's all they had time for, some closeness and then he had to jet. But its all good, he is coming back tomorrow night and again on Tuesday. They are walking a path that is all new to her...
I write all of this in trying to be honest with myself and I also completely realize that I am being worrisome about things that will probably never happen. But at the same time, I don’t like to be completely blindsided so I like to think ahead a little. It’s all good.